Saturday, November 12, 2005

Generation Gap

I am just tripping over ideas lately. In a comment to my post about
a substitute teacher telling one of my students he needed to get
himself a joint, Erica mentioned how it is hard for older people
to sub at high school and middle school, because they don't
know the lingo. Which of course reminded me of another story.

Several years ago, I taught science at a school of about 270
middle school kids. This was a very rural area. We had an older
woman named 'Marge' who was a teacher's assistant for the
Behavior Disorder classroom. I passed Marge's house on the
way into and out of town each day. Once we traveled through
there on a weekend, on our way to Branson, and saw Marge
sitting on her front porch snapping green beans.

We didn't pay much mind to Marge. She was one of us, but
we didn't seek her out, or ask her opinion on anything. We
were cordial, and didn't make fun of her. Until...One lunch
period, Marge came into the teachers' lounge shaking her
head. "I just don't know what to do with those boys!"

"What's going on, Marge?" asked the Social Studies teacher
from behind the sports section.

Marge set her paper bag lunch on the table, pulled up a chair,
and took out a sandwich. "Well, every day Rocky and Tony
come in, and they're picking and poking at each other. They
can't settle down. So today, I was getting onto them, and
Rocky asked me why I was so mean. I told him, 'I don't
want to be mean. If you two would just stop fingering each
other...' And they started laughing and couldn't stop. What
did I say?"

By this time, we were laughing and couldn't stop. Tears
streamed from our eyes. The Social Studies teacher had
put down his paper and was coughing on some food. He
said, "Marge, I can't tell you what that means. But if I was
you, I wouldn't talk to the kids about 'fingering'."


Blogger Dancing Crow said...

Oh my, oh my, oh my, I had to stop laughing before I could write this comment.


Thankyou for the laugh. I needed that.
I'm glad I randomly hit your blog.

6:03 PM  
Blogger Rebecca said...

Hi Hillbilly Mom,
Well it sounds like it was a very open minded school, if students were allowed to finger each other in class. Not sure if I would send my kids there though, not really the education I want taught.

6:54 PM  
Blogger MamaKBear said...

I know I can count on you for a good laugh, or at least a chuckle!

You are one of my favorite bloggers!

12:38 AM  
Blogger Erica said...

Oh, poor Marge!! You have the best teaching stories EVER.

I would also like to add how honored I am to provide you creative inspiration over the last couple of posts. I feel uber cool now, so thanks. :D

10:13 AM  
Blogger Huggies said...

Poor Marge has never been fingered in her life.

11:35 AM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

Dancing Crow,
Marge must have led a sheltered life.

Well, my 3rd year there, they found out the Social Studies teacher, who also coached girls' basketball, had been molesting them for years. I guess he really knew his fingering.

Thanks for the compliment. I am a sit-down comedian.

Now I will expect inspiration from you twice a week. Don't let the pressure get to you.

I think you're right on that one. I don't know how she ever had a kid.

1:13 PM  

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