Sunday, April 30, 2006

The Firestarter

I walked over to the barn this morning to tell the guys I was going
to town, and I saw him. My 8-year-old son flitting around a pile
of smoking debris, tossing twigs onto the licks of flame that shot
out every now and then. Totally unattended.

My Hillbilly Husband was working in the barn, trying to fit an
O-ring on a line for the air compressor. Yeah, I don't know what
that is, either. #1 son was drilling holes in the bottom of an old
oil barrel. HH had said the boys could stay with him while I
went to town. Silly me! I actually thought that meant he would
watch them.

My #2 son has a recent fascination with fire. Every evening, he
can't wait until his dad gets home. "Maybe we can start a fire!"
He starts in the minute HH comes through the door, before
supper or homework or sitting in the old-people-smelling, hair-
wad-secreting free hot tub. "Can we go burn something, Dad?"
They burn our cardboard trash, or limbs that fall off the trees
that #1 and #2 drive around and throw in the back of the Scout.

I asked HH why #2 son was prancing around the fire with no
supervision. "Well, I've been checking on him." HH was IN THE
BARN. The homemade door won't stay open. #1 son was drilling
through metal. HH was running the compressor. He could not see
or hear the boy. AND...even if he opened the door, his truck was
in the way. Not the truck bed, in the picture that is in the link for
the barn. His Ford F250 Extended Cab Long Bed 4WD truck that's
too big to fit in the garage was parked right in front of the barn. He
couldn't see the fire or the boy. By now, the boy had run over and
sat in a lawn chair about 10 feet from the fire. HH said, "See, he's
fine. He's just watching it."

EEEEEEE! What was he thinking? I wouldn't even let the boy
go on a class trip to a handicap-accessible cave, and he let him
frolic around a fire, unattended? Did he not watch Survivor:
Australian Outback, when that Michael guy fell into the fire
and burned the skin off his hands, just because he got too close
and inhaled a lungful of smoke? I shamed HH so that he moved
the truck, and made #2 move his chair down by the barn door.

I left them that way, the boy in a lawn chair watching an old stump
smolder, waiting for a flame to shoot out the knothole on the side.
That's entertainment for hillbilly young 'uns. Never mind that HH
has a TV/VCR/DVD upstairs, with a fridge full of food and drink.
My boy wants to watch smoke rise. I, myself, prefer standing on
the front porch watching the rain, inhaling the air, but I guess that's
an adult pleasure.


Blogger Redneck Diva said...

Abby has a fascination with fire as well and that is rather disconcerting to a parent, I know. We built a fire ring last fall for our many bonfires/campfires/weenie roasts/hayrides that we host from time to time and she wanted to have one roarin' every stinkin' night! When we'd get one going, she'd be lying on her side, inches from the fire, poking it with a stick. Yeesh.

4:40 PM  
Blogger Cazzie!!! said...

Ditto redneck dive, our number 1 son Tomas loved the fire when he went a campin' over the Easter break here. Apparently, his grandmother let him START the fire every morning. FFS...I dunno how my husband and the 4 siblings from my out-laws family EVER survived if they were allowed to play with the fire!
It is almost as bad as my mother out-law propping open the pool gate with a shovel so their dog can poop on the only bit of grass in the backyard that happens to be beside the pool. Hence she does not babysit our younguns much.
FIREBUGS, I think there's at least one in every family.

7:09 PM  
Blogger Cazzie!!! said...

BTW, I just LOVE the barn, I wish we lived out bush like my cousin does. :)

7:10 PM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

OK, now I don't know if to be comforted because other kids are also firebugs, or be disturbed about all the future arsonists.

Here's my new boy has been sucking on the tags of pillows. After eating chocolate easter eggs. So the tags are brown and soggy. Please, please, PLEASE tell me this is a stage your young 'uns went through as well.

Diva? Cazzie? Anybody...anybody...?

8:08 PM  
Blogger Cazzie!!! said...

LMAO!!! All my kids loved the tags on their "Blankies"..them soft knitted blankets with satin edges on them. But, no, they never did suck on them honey.
:) Cazzie!!!

9:36 PM  
Blogger Redneck Diva said...

Never the tags to pillows, but I did take Abby to the doctor when she was little because she was licking and sucking on everything metal in her path. Zippers, the hinges on the fridge, the legs on desks, forks, etc. I thought she had an iron deficiency. Turns out she was just weird.

11:06 AM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

Well, they don't know what they're missing! The tag appeared to have been enjoyed to the maximum extent.

It doesn't take a doctor to tell me my young 'uns are weird.

8:56 PM  

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