Monday, June 19, 2006

College Clip Chicken Chip

No rocks for you, Stacie! I know you said you like them. Now.
Now that you're not going to get any more. Now that I am with-
holding the rocks from you, you can't get enough. Uh huh. I see
how it is. Oh, you'll be beggin' me for some rock photos, mark
my words. But I'm not going to toss them back in the creek. The
creek can get its own rocks. Thanks to Bluejinx, I got the bright
idea of giving them out to all the little Charlie Browns who dare
trick-or-treat at the Mansion.

Sunday morning, HH called me from a flea market. He said,
"Don't take your rocks back to the creek just yet. They have
three boxes of them here labeled 'Indian Tools'. They are selling
from $4 to $20 apiece." Heh heh. Too bad we don't have a
booth at the flea market. But good that I got MY rocks for free.

Today was my boy's first day of college. College For Kids, at the
local junior college. He's taking Boats, Planes, and Trains, and has
been looking forward to it all summer. I gave him my cell phone,
$5, and left him. He's a resourceful little fellow for 11.

The #2 son and I stopped by Great Clips to get him a shaved
head. Last time, HH took him, and not enough was cut. Since
we were the only two customers, I decided to get my lady-mullet
trimmed as well. I did feel a bit guilty about two-timing my regular
haircuttress, the one who looks like Redneck Diva. But without
the pirate do-rag.

A young whippersnapper of a gal took the kid behind a mirrored
wall to commence cutting. Two workers came back from lunch
about then, and an old one called me back. She was way older
than any other Great Clips girls I had ever seen. She looked to be
the same age as me, by cracky! And kind of cranky. Which we all
know is OH SO UNLIKE me. Picture the world's first supermodel,
Janice Dickinson, only not as attractive. And not as friendly. Yeah.
Now that you're done screaming in horror...she was great.

HAGatha was wrinkley, with hair dyed the same shade as mine.
You can bet your bottom dollar that SHE did not yell out, "I see
that you dye your hair" the minute she flung that rubber sheet
thingy around my neck. And she didn't keep trying to sell me
'product' the way that last Great Clipper did, either. HooRah,
HAGatha! You're my cup of tea. Though I doubt that either one
of us drink tea. We seem more like the Coors Light type of gals.
She gave me the best cut I've had in years. She got right down
to it. I was done before the boy young 'un. HAGatha snipped
and clipped and said, "I know you part it there, but I'm just
combing it this way to cut it." She was not gentle, either. She
yanked and pulled and made my hair do as she pleased. It
was great. I hope she's working the next time I take the kids
in. I believe she's an acquired taste.

From there, we drove thru Burger King for a Grilled Chicken
Caesar Salad. Normally, I would compliment this place for the
salad. They put the hot chicken in a separate bag, so it doesn't
make your lettuce all wilty before you get it home. But no. They
made it with iceberg lettuce. To me, that is quite a Caesar Salad
faux pas. It should be made with romaine lettuce, my dear
adolescent minimum-wage workers. Romaine. Not iceberg.
We're not exactly a hotbed of gourmet cuisine.

When I got home and put my salad together, I added some chips
on the side. Oh, not real chips. The pressed potato flake chips
in a can. No, not Pringles. Lay's. They were on sale at Save A Lot.
Here's something you may not know about Lay's chips-in-a-can:
when dropped from a height of oh...I don't know...a computer
desk...they do not break. They bounce. In fact, you could pick
them up and eat them. If you are the kind of person who would
do that sort of thing. For the love of Gummi Mary, people! It's not
a granola bar off the garage floor!

I am making a list, though not checking it twice. I'm not quite as
compulsive as some people. You know who you are. I'm ready
to write my Big Blogger 2 report. HM's the name. Stalking's the
game. Bwahaha! Tune in tomorrow to see who I've been stalking.
As if there's any doubt.


Blogger Rebecca said...

Hi Hillbilly Mom,
I am on a quest to find the best Caesar Salad. While I am yet to find it, I am getting close. Finally I found a place that coodles the egg, and not boil it, but the anchovies were basically non-existant. I will keep looking.

10:19 PM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

Good luck on your quest. You ain't gonna find it near Hillmomba. Perhaps some Caesar Salad Jerky...

11:25 PM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

You might notice that your comment is not here. That is because I deleted it.


Oh, the bad comment on my duplicate post. If only I had posted all my Lovely Rock Photos Jeannie twice. Darn that free BLOGGER, always playing tricks on me! It's as bad as somebody honking and waving the other way. If you know what I mean. Which I'm sure you do.

11:30 PM  

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