Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Friendship Issues

Will somebody please just be friends with JustLinda? Just because?

What gives, people? Why can't adults make new friends? Are we
not worthy of your friendship, Linda and I? Because from her
comments, it looks like many people are in the same boat as
Linda and me. We'd better be careful. Does anybody know
the capacity of this boat? We don't want to sink like the Brown
Family on Treasure Hunters.

Why are adults not interested in making new friends. Is it just me?
And JustLinda? If you move somewhere, people act like they
already have enough friends. Oh, they may humor you, and do
something with you a couple times, but then they fade away. If
you move back to your hometown, guess what? Life went on
without you! People have formed new social circles. You are
left out of the loop.

It's not a matter of waiting for someone to approach you. I
have made the first move to be friendly with people. But then
I wonder if they feel as if they have to be nice to me. Like at
work. I have people I know will accept me if I walk up to sit
at their table. Some of them I feel comfortable calling at home.
A few of them I would feel OK about inviting to my home.
Then there are others who appear to be my friend when it is
just the two of us, but would drop me in a minute if somebody
better came along. And listen to THIS horror story: there was
even a person who was supposed to sit at a table with me at
parent conferences who took her nametag off our assigned
table and moved it to a different table! What's up with that?

I am not a stalker. Nor am I a close-talker, a low-talker, a bore,
a misfit, or a whiner. Except for the fact that most people piss
me off, I am a good friend candidate. Just ask my real-life buddies
Mabel and Bean. Oops! You can't do that because they don't
have blogs. How unfortunate! They are my friends. Really. They
are not, as Rebecca has suggested, imaginary. They can vouch
for my friendship qualifications. Perhaps I need a friendship
resume, with references.

Why is it that adults don't want to make new friends? Have we
just not found the right ones, the ones who are compatible with
us? Is it too much effort? Are they set in their ways? I don't have
the answer. But if you lived next door to me, Linda, Diva, Mrs.,
Ann, Colleen, Lessa, Rebecca, Lantern, and Cazzie...I think we
could have some laughs and be actual friends instead of blogfriends.
Of course, you would all be crammed into a trailer with a yard that
we set on fire each July 4, but I think each of you could be happy
being my neighbor and my friend. I'd even let y'all poach deer and
turkey off my land, and pick up rocks from my creek.

Perhaps I have answered my own question about friendships.


Blogger Redneck Diva said...

My dear Hillbilly Mom, I have said it before and I'll say it again - if we lived closer to each other there is no doubt in my mind that we laugh ourselves into a smaller dress size (except I don't wear dresses, but I guess that's beside the point) every time we hung out. I'd show up on your porch with all the fixin's for homemade Chex Mix and sit at your table drinking apple martinis with Coors Light chasers while you fixed it for me and then, just for kicks, I'd clog dance on your deck right before I jumped into your hairwad-free hot tub. Because friends can do that.

I don't know why adults are like that. I have run into my fair share of backstabbers, liars and Fakey McFakertons, as well. Just know that by cracky, I'll be there for you, following you around with a box of Chex and a bottle of Worchestershire. Because you're The $hit.

And if JustLinda has done the whole deodorant under the boobs thing, I think she's The $hit as well. For the record.

7:51 PM  
Blogger Rebecca said...

Hi Hillbilly Mom,
Is that an invite to visit the Mansion?
If that is the case, next time I am in the USA, I am dropping around for a cuppa.

PS: Ok, so I will relent that Mabel is not an imaginary friend, but Bean? Come on, you can do better than that.

9:00 PM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

You can clog at my Mansion any time, but please use the outhouse instead of the toilet for your elimination needs.

I would laugh myself from a can of Coors Light down to a Miller pony if you and your uniboob showed up on my porch. By cracky! I cannot tell a lie. I DO make the best Chex Mix.

I would share my redneck bounty with you. My Hot Cabana Boys are your hot Cabana Boys. If you need to get away from it all for a night, you can stay in the 5th wheel camper parked in my front yard. You can lay IN the floor and relax after we exhaust ourselves laughing. Perhaps we should have our own redneck lingo: RIFLMAO.

Linda can come over too, as long as she promises to use her underboob deodorant.

Yes, drop in when you're here. I'll give you a hint. The Mansion is located on the mainland, not in Alaska or Hawaii. With a clue like that, you're sure to find me.

Don't blow off the Bean. Bean knew me when I was a can of Coors Light. In fact, Bean was cropped out of that very picture. Bean is the real deal.

10:19 PM  
Blogger MamaKBear said...

Awwww I feel so left out!

As for the friends thing...I just don't trust people anymore, so I don't have many friends.

1:04 AM  
Blogger AverageMom said...

Well see, I wrote to Linda and told her just how much I'd love to be her friend, and she didn't write back to me!!! So now even the friendless blog lady has rejected me...sniff...

2:24 AM  
Blogger Rebecca said...

Hi Hillbilly Mom,
Don't worry, I have worked out where you live, and once Big Blogger is over and done with, I will be letting the world know my findings. My Beclakian spies have done their job well.

2:50 AM  
Blogger JustLinda said...

Yeah, but you double-wide trailor people are SUCH snobs. I'm not hanging out with you. But I'll come by on Halloween - the double-wides have the BEST candy!

8:20 AM  
Blogger JustLinda said...

I cannot believe I have a reputation for underboob deoderant! THAT is what I am known for- underboob deoderant??? No wonder I can't make friends... LOL - oops, I mean RIFLMAO.

8:24 AM  
Blogger Chickadee said...

Ohhh Hillbilly Momma, I would sooo love to come to your mansion. I think your place is kewl, based on the pictures you've posted.

I think you're right...I have the same friendship issues. I even had a longtime friend drop me like a hot tamale once she met her husband...that really hurt.

Of course, I"m not perfect in the friendship circle,I've had periods where I was really busy and wasn't able to take care of my friends, but I went back when I had the time.


9:30 AM  
Blogger Janet said...

I went and visited Linda and now I'm here.

I don't know what everyone's deal is either. Yes we all have lives. Yes we all are busy. But too busy to make time for friends? Impossible!

9:32 AM  
Blogger Mr Bates said...

It's because when you get to be our age, you realize how much time you have wasted on complete f***ers. Also, our bar is set way to high. I agree that if I could populate a neighborhood with the likes of our readers and readees, the block parties would know no end. But I live in a neighborhood where a machine secreted a bunch of closed-minded, redneck (in the worst sense), conservative religious zealots. (AKA baptists)

And I don't get out much, either. Another problem.

And everyone, like you, pisses me off! (Ooops! Not "everyone like you pissea me off"! I mean "as you have so described of yourself, I am infuriated by the multitudes of wastrels and half-wits!")

My 10 or so great friends I have known since I was a teen. The only new person I have met (outside of my circle of friends) is now my girlfriend.

I might just stop there.

4:14 PM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

I knew I would forget somebody. OH SO SORRY! Of course you would make a good neighborly friend. You are a casino sistahhhh! I have never ever trusted people. The friends we do have are special, because they have survived the no-trust cut.

That could be the saddest story I've ever heard. (To steal a line from that classic movie, Coyote Ugly.)

Don't fret about it. That's JUST Linda!
I'm sure she was busy packing some ham for a trip to Florida, or cleaning up the house so the Nanny would think highly of her. I don't even want to think that she was busy with those fancy shoes of hers, or the Pop Rocks.

I am sure you are just funnin' with me. I KNOW you don't want to go startin' any Spy vs Spy shenanigans with the psychic nation of Hillmomba. ;)

We were just talking about you...Let me set the record straight. I don't live in a double-wide trailer. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I love that old Sammy Kershaw song that goes: "So I made her the queen of my double-wide trailer, with the polyester curtains and the redwood deck." The trailer is what all my special friends will live in. My current neighbors' trailer next door.

Your underboob deodorant reputation precedes you. Embrace it. And being a Missouri gal, don't tell me you've never heard people say they are going to lay IN the floor. Or that their kids are playing IN the road. None of this ON crap for us, by cracky!

Well, I've only posted pictures of the CLEAN part of the mansion. I have a fake reputation to uphold. You would like hiding in the laundry room to watch the birds steal dogfood out of the dog dishes. I never know what kind they are. All I recognize are the cardinals, and some redheaded woodpecker-looking guy without the crested head. He's got a smooth round red head, a gray body, and sometimes he sits sideways on the support posts the way woodpeckers do. I haven't been able to check out his feet to see if he has the two toes forward and two toes back like woodpeckers do. Does that make sense? Or am I raving lunatic about the bird thingy? And while you're lurking in the laundry room, could you fold a couple loads for me? Thanks.

I wouldn't drop a friend for my husband. He used to get upset that I wouldn't take him to Trivia Contests that I played with friends from work. That is just no fun. I have to get away from him sometime. I didn't ask to go to HIS stock car races, now did I?

You'd think we could set aside time every couple of weeks to do something friendly. Build it into the routine.

I agree. There are some fools at work who I do not suffer gladly.

Wow! How did you hold onto 10 friends? Are they chained in your basement or something, rubbing the lotion on their skin? I don't even know how to contact my bestest friends. I have moved, and they have moved, and we've lost touch.

8:15 PM  
Blogger Cazzie!!! said...

I make alot of friends and indeed everyone knows me at work as "The little bank nurse". THey know I have kids so I am not always invited out to bars and dances after work, they think I may need to get back home and you know, kiss my already sleeping kids goodnight. So, as a rule, my work friends are just work friends, although I have a couple that I have over here once in a while and we catch up for a latte and cake.
My friends I have known for a long long time we get to see every now and then. It is as if time never went by us when we meet up. My best friend Julie I have known since I was 4 and she was 4yrs old too. We live far away from each other but when we catch up it is a hoot. As Diva said, if we lived close to great friends we would all laugh our dress sizes away :)
I reckon that if we all lived close it would be soooo coool, we would realy all get along so well. The kids could hang out and trail bike ride and do crazy shit like we did as kids too.
Last year when I was sick in hospital, I knew who my friends were, they were the oldest friends of all, they stuck by us when I was there for 6 weeks, I cherich that :)

9:51 PM  
Blogger deadpanann said...

I think MamaK and Mr. B have the answer--- adults are just too jaded to be open to new friends.

7:58 AM  
Blogger LanternLight said...

But if you lived next door to me, Linda, Diva, Mrs., Ann, Colleen, Lessa, Rebecca, Lantern, and Cazzie...I think we could have some laughs and be actual friends instead of blogfriends.

Well Hillbilly Mom, I'm mighty honoured to be part of that list.

As long as I don't have to sit next to Cazzie. Someone in my family is a nurse, and they take great delight in sticking me with needles whenever they can :-)
(I'm sure Cazzie would have the same evil streak. "This is good for you LL". Jab. Ouch!)

3:24 PM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

I agree about the catching up. I found an old friend last year on the internet. We picked up like it was yesterday, not 20 years. Yes, it would be a blast if I could move y'all into the trailer next door. The blast would be from the kids blowing things up with fireworks while we left them unattended.

It's true, you know who your real friends are because they care for you when you are down. I have three at school who were OH SO THOUGHTFUL when I had my surgery...the one where I woke up during the operation.

Miss Ann,
Yes, adults have fully-operational BS detectors to screen out the DoNots.

I've given you a harem. That's your reward for complimenting us. It's karma.

I think you secretly wish to sit next to Cazzie because she has a big bus.

I will let Cazzie stick me with needles all day long if she continues with the free medical advice. Needles don't bother me.

6:15 PM  
Blogger Cazzie!!! said...

HAHA, how did I miss that LAntern comment!!! Well, I always tell the truth, and nothing but the truth before I give a needle, "Yes, this will hurt, but I have been giving needles since age 12 to people and I will do my best not to hurt you. The main pain of it is the injecting of the solution, after that I can rub the sore bit or you can do it yourself. The reason I do not mind giving it to you is the health benefits the injection is going to give you, or if it is an analgesic, the analgesic benefite is will give you".
Mind you, I also tell it to people who are unable to speak, through whatever reason, just in case they CAN hear me. Being a patient many times I know it is valued to let your patients be educated along the way. If they prefer not to know and just get it over with then I just do it..NIKE style, LOL.

7:49 PM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

Maybe now Lantern will sit by you. As long as he knows you're only poking him for his own good!

9:40 PM  

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