Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Greetings From Hillbilly Mom's House of Pain

Stop that! It's not a new hillbilly S & M venture. It means I am in
my mansion, hurting. Hurting OH SO BADLY. Yet I still know
how to use an adverb, if not proper sentence structure.

I have managed to injure my knee, though I don't know how. Do
not suggest old age. I had surgery on this knee twice in the last
century. I know there is a fragment of cartilage jammed in there.
That's why it hurts. This has happened before, though it is usually
jammed on the side, and now it's jammed right in the middle.
It normally runs its course in 4 or 5 days. The swelling goes
down, and the piece moves on to float the lazy river of my
synovial fluid until the next attack.

I am trying to be a good hillbilly and conform to the ICE therapy.
Which of course is ice, compression, elevation. Actually, I am
doing fairly well with the IE, but not the C, because I hate those
elastic wrap thingies that never stay where you want them to
unless you fasten them tight as a tourniquet, which I really think
is frowned upon in medical circles unless you are bleeding from
the femoral artery or some such tragedy.

It is OH SO PAINFUL to sit, get up, lie down, walk, etc.
So I have taken some medication without my name on the
prescription. Please don't compare me to Rush Limbaugh.
My Hillbilly Mama had some hydrocodone left from her
dental emergency, and passed it on to me. She's my supplier.
I think that's the same ingredient that's in my sweet, sweet,
Histinex. And in the fake Vicodin that I had after my surgery
where I woke up in the middle of the operation. Ahh...
Good times. But this stuff is making me nauseous. For one
hour of pain relief, I get 3 1/2 hours of nausea. So far. I
haven't decided if it's worth it yet. Hillbilly Mom doesn't
miss many meals.

I hate it when this happens. I hate the grindy feeling of the innards
of my knee when I stand up. I hate the sudden weakness that
signals me to grab onto something before that leg collapses.
I hate the dragging of the leg through the house to do my chores.
I hate the lack of sympathy from my Hillbilly Husband, who has
had the same thing happen to him, except that I waited on him
hand and foot, and he had crutches and his own prescription of
pain medicine, and MRIs, and laid in bed whining that he was
dying, and eventually had surgery.

Now that I've vented, and made it into a post so I don't have to
think up a real topic to blog about today, I am feeling very much
the same. Who knew? I thought that was supposed to make you
feel better. I am now going upstairs to prop some ice on my
elevated knee, perhaps shed a few tears from the intense pain,
contemplate whether another illegal dose of painkiller is worth
the nausea, and enjoy the peace while the rest of the family is
in the pool. If I start up the steps right now, I just might make
it by Friday.

11 Comments:

Blogger LanternLight said...

HUGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

So I have taken some medication without my name on the prescription. Please don't compare me to Rush Limbaugh.

Well obviously not, I mean, why would would you, you already have a stiff knee. ;-)

Hope you get better soon.

4:43 PM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

Lantern,
You are OH SO SWEET. I needed that hug. I'm not the only woman to have a painful knee, you know. Somebody told me that today. You get one guess who it was.

Heh, heh. Poor ol' Rush. I didn't need somebody else's medicine to make my knee stiff, either.

8:15 PM  
Blogger LanternLight said...

You get one guess who it was.

Her Majesty, Queen Rebecca of Beclakia?

9:35 PM  
Blogger MamaKBear said...

Pain of any kinds sucks...Hubby has knee problems too. Me? I tend to throw out my back from time to time. Argh.

Hope you're better soon!

12:11 AM  
Blogger Kieran said...

Why not take it out on someone else? I often find that when suffering to any degree, it is very helpful to lash out grmumpily and without provocation at my nearest and dearest. Once you've tried it you'll never go back.

6:10 AM  
Blogger MrsCoach2U said...

I feel for ya, my whole left leg is all F#()*## up! First it was my knee then my ankle, oh the misery!!!!

9:50 AM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

Lantern,
No, but quite appropriate. It was my dear HH, who has been known to say things like, "You ain't the first woman ever to have a baby" when I was put on a week of bed rest while pregnant, and HH also added "The doctor didn't mean you couldn't stand up for a half hour to cook supper and wash the dishes." He's a true prince among men, by cracky.

MamaKB,
Now that you mention it, my back has also started to hurt...

Kieran,
I heartily agree. Been there, doing it right now.

Mrs.,
Sweet Beaver! Can you not heal yourself with all that free cheese lying around?

10:06 AM  
Blogger Redneck Diva said...

I can sympathize, dear Hillbilly Mom. Remember last summer and my Fat Foot and my ripped-up fascia? Oh yeah...I'm no stranger to the pain.

Get better soon! Need me to come over and fix you something with Free Cheese and Hydrocodone - perhaps some Feel Good Nachos? Quesadillas El Addicto? Let me know, friend, and I'm on my way.

8:43 AM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

Diva,
Isn't that a Willie Nelson song: I'm No Stranger to the Pain?

Doggone, gal! You know how to sling a recipe. That sounds fantastic. No wonder you get all those children to take a nap at the same time.

6:28 PM  
Blogger Redneck Diva said...

I think it's a Randy Travis song....or George Strait....no, Randy....now I'm Googling it....

Keith Whitley. Duh.

But that's rain....maybe Willie is no stranger to the pain and that's why he and Mary Jane are friends.

10:05 AM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

Diva,
Perhaps ol' Willie should join Tom Petty for Mary Jane's Last Dance. Methinks. Because his Mary Jane allowance would have gone a long way in payin' off those back taxes.

Keith Whitley ain't a-feelin' any pain no more...

9:41 PM  

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