Thursday, April 06, 2006

Crime Scene Interpretation

Taxes are DONE, man! Pretend I said that just like 'Kenny' in the
movie Don't Tell Mom, the Babysitter's Dead. Only Kenny said
it after he did the dishes, and by did, I mean he took the dirty dishes
up on the roof and threw them like Frisbees (ahem...flying discs)
and he and his friends shot them. With guns. Not that I took my
taxes up on the roof and shot them. I finished them in two nights.
The state taxes are incredibly taxing. No wonder people wait in
line at Wal*Mart for Jackson-Hewitt. When I see the level of
math that my DoNots perform, it's just as well. Hopefully I can
be part of the solution, not the problem, next year when I am
teaching the Double Dose Math. That means the kids have to
take TWO math classes in 7th, 8th, and 9th grade if they fail their
regular math class. That alone should show a great reduction in
the numbers after the first year. TWO MATHS? When they could
have been taking Tech, or FACS, or keyboarding, or art. Hmm...
I think they'll make the connection.

Anyhoo, back to ME ME ME. I have to pay Missouri taxes to the
tune of $21. But I get back a little federal refund. No doubt HH
has plans to put a NASCAR track in the garage, or something
similar, for his next plot to drive me crazy.

Our area has been on the St. Louis news lately. Seems a 17-year-
old boy has disappeared from a nearby county. I do not like to
think of what might have happened to him. I can not imagine what
his family is going through. I wish he would turn up with a good
explanation, but life does not always have a happy ending. Here
is a bit of the story:

The boy attended a house party at a local lake development on
Saturday. He did not return home. It has been reported that he
was last seen around 1:30 a.m., asleep in his car. Nobody can
remember seeing him leave. The guard at the guard shack thinks
he saw the car leave, but he can't be sure, and doesn't remember
who was driving it. The camera at the guard shack resets every
2 hours, according to Mr. S at my lunch table. I don't know how
he came by this information. The police say that the boy has a
good relationship with his parents, and is not the type to run away.
By all accounts, he is a good kid, and would have called if there
was some reason he wasn't coming home.

We have a lot at that lake development. I have been around the
lake, and on the lake, and driven across the dam. The lake is
160 feet deep in some places. Here is what bothers me about
this case:

Mr. S pointed out that if he's such a 'good kid', why was he at
an unsupervised house party where alcohol was served, and he
was still there at 1:30 a.m.?

His phone was seen on the charger in his car, but no calls were
made from the phone after he disappeared. Teenagers call each
other late at night.

The road from the lake to his county is a windy, two-lane blacktop
through woods and farmland. He could have run off and been
hidden from passersby.

Another news station reported that the boy was last seen "passed
out in his car." That changes matters. What if somebody panicked?

Imagine a bunch of teenage underage drinkers at an unsupervised
house party after 1:30 a.m. Are they going to use good judgement?
Probably not. What if...something happened to the kid, and they
decided to hide the evidence? What would keep them from rolling
that car and kid into the lake? It could be done from the dam. The
water is pretty deep down there. I don't want to think this is what
happened, but that is where my mind wanders. I sure hope that's
not the case. Today, law enforcement was supposed to use sonar
to check the lake. I haven't heard what they found.

Another situation on the news: in another county, a 22-year-old
man died after chewing a Fentanyl pain patch. I have seen posters
and flyers all around several towns about a benefit his family is
having this weekend. I wondered what happened to him. Then
I watched the news. There was his sister, saying how dangerous
this Fentanyl patch is. Ahem. I think most people know that it is
a PATCH to apply to your skin to relive pain. I don't think it is
dangerous if you don't PUT IT IN YOUR MOUTH AND CHEW
IT! I know, I am heartless. But to me, that is kind of like drinking
some poison and then being shocked that (!) IT POISONS YOU!
I feel sorry for the guy's family, but don't you think some people
would not want to give donations if they knew the reason that
donations are needed? Or maybe I'm the only heartless person
in Blogland.

Isn't this the same drug that 'allegedly' killed that Michael Tata
from the show American Casino? Only it wasn't a patch, it was
a stick, which is made to dissolve in the mouth. Seems he used
it with a bit of vodka, and alcohol and Fentanyl are deadly

And since we're discussing sweet, sweet Fentanyl, a drug with
which I have not had any personal was Dr. Carter's
sweet mistress around Season 6 of ER. Seems he was injecting it
under his watch band, scamming it off people screaming in pain, to
hide in his lab coat pocket and skinpop at his earliest convenience.
Alas, that ALLABOUTME Abby Lockhart narced on him, and
she'd only been on the show a few weeks, what with transferring
down from OB, where she was a nurse, to the ER, where she
was a med student. You go, girl! I hated that snivelling little rich
boy with a passion. Prissy, nostril-flaring, self-righteous, Gamma-
loving, Benton-a$$-kissing, blueblooded boring wimp. I am no
Noah Wyle fan, as you can see.

Anyhoo...I didn't really have a point tonight. And now it is late,
and my teaching buddy, Mabel, will chastise me tomorrow for
trying to make her miss some beauty sleep waiting for this
exciting post that her husband thinks I write just for her. Rock
on, Mabes. You are about the only one reading it now, anyway.
And you really must watch ER reruns this summer, because
there are sure to be more references here.


Blogger Huggies said...

All I know is one thing is certain in life. Death & Taxes. It seems you have covered it all in this post.

5:01 PM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

Why couldn't I think of that for the title?

6:15 PM  
Blogger Redneck Diva said...

Good heavens!! People chewing patches, underage drinking, taxes and Noah Wyle . . . I think I need a nap after reading this post!

12:11 PM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

You snooze, you lose here at the Mansion. No cut of the tax refund for youuuu!

3:45 PM  

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