Monday, July 24, 2006

And the winner is...

This ain't no Miss Universe post. It's Miss Bloggerverse. And the
winner of Big Blogger 2 is: ME ME ME!!! Toot, toot, yeah...
BEEP BEEP! That's the sound of me tooting my own horn. What
did you expect? Donna Summer singing Bad Girls?

Yes, your very own Hillbilly Mom is the proud winner of Big
Blogger 2! Am I making you sick yet? Are any of you green with
envy? Anybody overindulge in sour grapes? Cause I'm proud as
punch. Not that nasty Hawaiian Punch, with the straw hatted guy
who used to walk up and pummel people in the commercials. The
OH SO DELICIOUS kind of punch served at awards dinners
and baby showers, the orange juice/pineapple juice/orange sherbet
kind of punch. Thank you to all my loyal voters. I couldn't have
done it without y'all!

To my worthy opponent, the rookie Cazzie, and all the other
worthy Cyberhousemates who fell by the wayside, one more
than once, here's to you! I raise my Sonic Cherry Diet Coke
in a toast! HooRah, y'all!

And now, for the dispensing of the winnings...I'm all about the
glory, baby! For my winnings, I will take 3 samples of Australian
coins, plus $1 and $5 paper money. Yes, that's right. I require
3 sets of coins in values of .01, .05, .25, .50, and bills of 1.00
and 5.00. If you have them. For all I know, you could barter
with kangaroo turds, because I am not a world traveler, and
know nothing of history, and am pretty much a poster hillbilly
for the ugly American. The reason I request such moolah is
because I'd like each of my children to have a set, and there
is a student at school who collects coins from other nations.
HH brings us coins from his world travels, and this is a country
we don't have. That's us Mansion folk...taking over the world
one nation's coinage at at time.

The rest of my winnings should go to Cazzie, the runner-up, to
fix up her Big Bus. Were I to have it, I would only put it into
lottery or Sonic Cherry Diet Cokes. It would fritter away in
several months, whereas a Big Bus is forever.

I hope Big Blogger deems these arrangements appropriate. I will
email her with the details, I can't have everybody on the internets
knowing my personal bidness. Let's just say that cash through the
mail is routine in the hillbilly world, but because my mail has been
stolen before, I will have to use an alternate shipping address.
They even stole my bills! Can you believe it? I couldn't either.
In fact, I didn't know it until I had two phone bills and two
electric bills that were 30 days past due. Hey! Do any of you
pay bills you don't get? Didn't think so. They even took my
letter telling me when to report back to work. Lucky for me,
I have my loyal friend, Mabel, to tell me where to go. And when.
Anyhoo...that's been a couple years ago, but I still ain't takin'
no chances with my winnings!

Now, for the best part...AFTERPARTY AT THE MANSION!
Give me some suggestions for entertainment, refreshments, guest
list, how to get rid of the kids and HH. Of course all Cyberhouse-
mates are invited, along with all of our readers. Each person may
bring ONE guest. Don't test me! There won't be enough room if
people bring more than one guest. I only have 20 acres, you know.
You may bring a buddy, a significant other, or somebody famous.
Let's hear what ideas y'all may have. Remember...what happens
at the Mansion stays at the Mansion. As well as any change that
falls out of anyone's pockets, and people who are too drunk to
drive home.

8 Comments:

Blogger Cazzie!!! said...

I shall bring one of the feral cats we catch in our cage so you can pass it onto Mr K at school when term begins again :)
Congratulations on the win...I think you are an admirable winner :)

1:46 AM  
Blogger Rebecca said...

This Is Big Blogger.

Well done Hillbilly Mom, you worked hard and it paid off.

As for your winnings. Australian money is in the following:
Coins: 5c, 10c, 20c, 50c, $1, $2.
Notes: $5, $10, $20, $50, $100.

A few years ago 1 and 2 cent pieces were taken out of circulation. What happens now is when a bill totals in 1,2,6 or 7 cents, it is rounded down to the nearest 5. If it ends in 3,4,8 or 9 cents, it is rounded up to the nearest 5. So if your bill came to $71.42, you would pay $71.40. If it was $12.38, you would pay $12.40.
I hope this clears things up.

Please let me know what monies you would like for your collection, and they will be posted to you.

This Has Been Big Blogger.

6:45 AM  
Blogger Huggies said...

congrats to you.. :)

6:47 AM  
Blogger Redneck Diva said...

CONGRATULATIONS!!!! I knew you could do it! Just two years in the making and now look at our OH SO PRETTY winner!

Here she is....Hi-ill-bil-ly Mom....

But if Big Blogger has to find out an address so she can mail you your winnings, then will you have to have the Blogger Protection Program people relocate you??

2:19 PM  
Blogger Lessa said...

WHOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOO!

I'm so happy all that clickin on your behalf worked! *grins* Congrats! I'd totally be down for a party at the mansion!

2:28 PM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

Cazzie,
Mr K is going back to his old school to teach this year. I hope it wasn't due to the cat harrassment. I will box up your critter and mail it to Mr K. The way the mail goes around here, he should get it by Christmas break.

Big Blogger,
Thank the Gummi Mary that it's not a kangaroo-turd economy! I will email you in the next few days with an address.

Mr.Huggies,
It seems like only a year ago that you beat me by a few thousand votes. You and a cheese sandwich and a sheep-on-a-unicycle. I missed you in this year's Cyberhouse!

Diva,
Thanks for reminding me that it took two years for me to win! I will have to give Big Blogger a mail drop address to maintain my anonymity. Like in: go down the gravel road, turn left at the upside down car, and leave the money under the dead possum beside the house with catfish head nailed on the telephone pole.

Lessa,
Thanks for the votes! I'll leave the light on for you. You've got a long way to travel to the party.

4:38 PM  
Blogger Cazzie!!! said...

I got you a cute kitty pic on my blog today :)

5:45 PM  
Blogger Hillbilly Mom said...

Cazzie,
How thoughtful of you!

9:25 PM  

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